Weeping With Those Who Weep

Three weeks ago, I gave a harp lesson to a local student of mine one Friday afternoon. Before her lesson, her Mom shared with me that they had a difficult week at home. Her mom wouldn’t have needed to share that with me; I could see it in her daughter’s face during her lesson.

The lesson in her harp book was a harder one, but I sensed a disconnect during the lesson. I could tell that she was thinking about something else. Her spirit seemed crushed and broken. 

I tried to make the lesson as enjoyable as I could. By the end of her lesson, I sensed a desire in her to share something with me. She put her small harp back inside its case, and then, sure enough, she began to share. As she shared, the tears came. 

This young lady is 16 years old. She lost her Dad due to cancer when she was 7 years old. She was grieving the loss of her father. She shared: 

“My Dad's birthday is coming up in November.” 

And then her tears came forth in a flood, privately, in the room we had our harp lesson in. I listened to her share many details about the pain in her life, including the loss of her Dad, for around 20-30 min. (her mom probably thought I decided to give her daughter an hour lesson that day instead of a half hour lesson) I cried with her and offered her a hug. When I did that, she wept on my shoulder. My dress was wet from her tears. 

It hurt me to hear what this young lady has had to walk through in her young life, so much more than just the loss of her Dad. She sees her younger sister hurting too and carries that pain also. Being a firstborn like her, I could relate. Her pain is something that no 16 year old should have to walk through in my mind. And yet, because she desires to walk with God, God has given her strength. 

Before we left the room, I briefly encouraged her with a few things. With God’s help, I tried to just listen to her as she shared her hurting heart. I assured her that I would pray for her and not share any specific details with anyone else that she shared so openly with me. (her Dad’s death is common knowledge.)

I carried that young lady close to my heart all weekend, and I lifted her up in prayer to God. I wished there was more I could do, but all I could do was listen and pray.

I read a quote that weekend that said: 

“If you cannot understand why someone is grieving for so long, consider yourself fortunate that you do not understand.”

The quote made me think about my student. Most people (myself included) have no idea what it is like to lose their Dad at such a young age. (and all the ramifications of that) 

My harp student didn’t need a sermon from me that day about what she should or should not do. If I would have corrected her instead of listening to her, she probably would have shut down immediately and would have never wanted to share with me again. 

My student needed a listening ear. She needed a shoulder to cry on. She needed someone to weep with her to help her bear her heavy burden. 

That made me think about these verses:  

“Bear ye one another’s burdens, and so fulfil the law of Christ.”

Galatians 6:2 

~

“Rejoice with them that do rejoice, and weep with them that weep.” 

Romans 12:15 

I see the first part of the verse in Romans lived out often, but I rarely see Christians weep with others when they are weeping. 

Thinking about this made me realize how much healing could be brought to the body of Christ by simply “weeping with those who weep.” 

This made me think about the story of Jesus just before he raised Lazarus to life. Jesus knew He was going to raise Lazarus back to life, but before He did that, the Bible says that “Jesus wept.” (John 11:35) 

Why would Jesus cry if He knew He was going to raise Lazarus back to life? 

Jesus identified with others in their grief. He cried with them. 

Isn’t that precious? We have a God who weeps with us in our grief and sorrow.

As Christians, when we weep with others in their grief and sorrow, I believe we display God to a broken and hurting world.